Thursday, September 3, 2009

10 more years, at best

As I enter a new semester, I've been thinking about why I involve myself in so much. Two majors, a minor, a job, and president of a club. I've consistently taken 16-18 credit hours each semester since starting BYU, and feel the need to hurry through my undergrad to get on to grad school and a career. I'm counting down the months until I get to turn in my mission papers.

I realized why I do this.

I'm scared to death that, since I'll be expected for the rest of my life to take care of kids and a husband, I need to cram as much self-fulfillment as possible into the short time I have left. I'm going to be honest: I really don't want kids. Like, really, really, really don't want kids. Were it not for the fact that loneliness isn't that much fun, I probably really wouldn't want to get married, either.


Amy said...

I speak as one who has no experience regarding children and marriage (other than intensely studying about it, of course).
1) I'm glad that you cram it all in because there are lots of people that don't and miss out and realize it later.
2) I'm happy that you use your time wisely.
3) I'm impressed that you have accomplished so much and will continue to be great!
4) I appreciate your work ethic and ambition to succeed. (I've witnessed it!)

However, I do have to say: None of your efforts will be wasted. Everything you work for now will be useful later - in ways that you may not see. Most importantly you will transfer everything that you are to your children and they will be more awesome because of it. What greater responsibility/opportunity will you have than to raise another human being? And influence who they become? Shelley, you are dynamic. You care about the world around you. I don't think children or a husband will stop you from being who you are. I think it will only enhance your ability to be the Shelley that you were meant to be. So, if anything, you'll be better for any sacrifice that you do make. I think you will see miracles unfold as you do what is right for you and follow God's plan for you ... and you'll see that everything that you do now will add up, and equal His ultimate desires for you. I have no doubt!

Marco & Demaree said...

No one wants marriage until the find the person they want to marry.

No one wants kids until they have one and realize they are, without a doubt, the greatest little things on planet earth.

Domestic bliss, whether it be for a man or for a woman, is the greatest bliss of all.

Cameron said...

I gotta say, we just had our first child, and I second what these people say. I would also submit that you'll have a lot more time for personal fulfillment than you think after these things happen.